"Where did that crazy idea come from?"

"There's nothing in the bill like that?"

"The crazies are making this stuff up."

"It's just not true."

"It doesn't exist."

"We are going to take it out of the bill, since it confuses people."

A recurring one happened again the other day. This time I had just finished making flight and hotel arrangements to attend our granddaughter's high school graduation in May. She's 17 years old and has already been accepted into the honors program of some fine universities. (Forgive me.)

This forthcoming milestone was making me feel my age as Suzanne (Big Mama) and I went out for Tex-Mex. Since she was my designated driver, I ordered a margarita. The waiter asked for my driver's license as proof of age.  I said, "Don't be ridiculous. You are kidding, aren't you?" He said with a straight face, "No, I have to do it." He swiped my license in some sort of machine attached to the cash register. I guess it's now part of my permanent record.

I've been through this routine before.  One day I was carded on the same day that I was given a senior citizens discount to a movie without asking for it. The state calls it "zero tolerance." Zero tolerance requires adult waiters, who have good vision and a brain, to card the Big Daddies of granddaughters about to set the college world on fire.

I don't know about you, but a government that requires its citizens to "be ridiculous" scares me. Laws that override common sense and good judgment scare me.

The waiters, of course, are victimized more than I am. It is they who are required to be ridiculous. What scares me the most is that the law apparently requires them to be ridiculous with a straight face and without snickering. And they obey. Not so much as a twinkle in the eye.

A government exercising that level of power and intrusion is too big for me. Put me down as a Small Government Guy.